Wednesday, 7 September 2016

Every silver lining has a cloud - or why bad things happen to good people.

The good news we got in February turned sour and we are now pretty much broke for the foreseeable future thanks to an overpayment from HMRC (their fault) which they are refusing to write off. It's complicated. We've written in to complain about it and implore they change their minds. Not hopeful.

Anxiety and depression are rearing their ugly heads in the house, leading to chest pains and much shouting. It's linked to the money worries. Even though I'm mentally not fit to work, I keep looking for jobs. I got an interview. It was disastrous. I was shaking like a leaf for most of it, with a lip and eye twitch to boot. See, I look pretty good on paper. Not so much in person. Still waiting to hear about the other jobs I've applied for. Ugh.

On a brighter note, there's a chance I could continue with my studies and complete my honours degree in Fine Art... which would lead to better communication and confidence with the staff, more familiarity with the setup at the college... an in-road to a job, should another art position arise. Because, you see, I can't teach primary. Too many kids. Can't teach secondary. Not enough respect from the kids. But I think I can teach other adults. That leaves tertiary education... so I need to do my honours, get a 2:1 or higher, go and get a teaching job and then do my TQFE through the job to keep the job. I think it's the only kind of job I could do. Just need to get funding for it or I'll not be able to do it at all because of aforementioned brokeness.

And keep your fingers crossed that my tax returns don't get bounced back, eh?

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